Saturday, April 13, 2013

Deployment Entry 11

It's the 13th today - yes I know... slack! I had a rest day from the gym. Will see tomorrow whether that was a good idea or not. Also had a nice long shower tonight since I missed the water cut off the last two nights and had to baby wipe and ENJO fibre wash with a bottle of water. It's interesting how nice it feels to have smoothly shaved legs again.

B2 was supposed to organise an FPSS photo today before the boss goes on leave but of course he didn't.  His ineffectiveness is mindblowingly obvious. Not sure how he will go as the acting OIC. And of course B1 has only been back a day and already the laziness is evident. I typed up 3 IR's this afternoon without so much as a helpful comment or anything from him. I suppose I should expect no less really.

Not long now until I head home. Had hoped to have more to write about and more to experience here in TK but the limited pages of my rambling will have to suffice.

Trying to work out now what the best career path and posting plan is for me. I have a feeling I might be headed for a posting to Darwin. Will be strange to be out of Brisbane and away from everyone I know and love. But then it's all part of life in the military I guess and people have always said that the travel is one of the best parts. Haven't truly experienced that yet because I've been in the same place for my entire career.

Really not sure what to do about M. Tested the waters a little last night it would seem, in my overly tired state. Made the mistake of mentioning the terrible V word - visit. Shot me down pretty damn quickly which was like being cut open and then kicked in the wound with salt covered boots.

"I love you" - but I never want to physically be in the same place as you. "You're my love" - but I will keep you at arms length and be reluctant to share too much with you. "I miss you" - but I won't ever call or let you hear my voice. "I need you" - but I'll never actually send you the things I claim I will. "I own you" - but I won't trust you enough not to be guarded and distant.

I must be the biggest idiot on the planet. An idiot with a permanent reminder of just how naive and lame I really am.

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